On Challenges

Do not be afraid to take on challenges.

They will enrich you and help align you with the capabilities that you thought you didn't have.

Thus, view challenge as an opportunity to break away from limiting beliefs and presumed fears.

I used to have a fear of heights.

I used to lack basic painting skills.

I used to be uncertain of my ability to write.

In fact, there are many things which I am still uncomfortable with.

No matter how confident I may seem, a lot of what I do is challenging for me.

I do not claim to be perfect at anything.

I am far from being an expert in anything.

Yet I mindfully choose how I can better invest my time.

Or how I can best utilise the resources I have.

And sometimes it means doing things that are out of my comfort zone.

I just take notice of what resonates with me or what fills me with curiosity.

I approach it, do what I can then leave the rest for the next time.

The only requirement is determination and consistency.

Apart from that there are no criteria for me to meet.

There is so much for me to do, death being the final deadline.

But with however little that I have done and irrespective of how insignificant it may appear to you,

The truth is I have learnt a great deal, I can see I am becoming what I am meant to be as a being.

In all my learnings, what I hold dear to me is that there is no definite right and wrong in the reality of this illusory realm.

Once you realise this, you tend to accept yourself and your surroundings.

You become open minded and gain access to the universal mind.

As I continue to learn, I hope you all walk alongside me, probably not towards the same goal.

However, towards our unique vision of being a better person and leaving the world a better place for all.

Let’s join together in understanding the power we possess and how it can help us manifest our advanced states.

Remember, it all begins when you let go of your fears and embrace the challenges ahead.

They may break you or make you but they will certainly strengthen you and enrich you. 

May peace, light and love be with you.

Monita.

Humility – an ordinary word but a rare trait

Is there any characteristic of mankind that can match humility? Is being humble something out of reach for the common man like you and I or can it be developed? Today let’s contemplate on this.

What does humility mean?

My interpretation is that humility is the mother of all virtues. True humility is not only a desirable trait but in my opinion it is a divine quality. But what exactly is it? In a typical scenario, the standard meaning of humility is to voluntarily put yourself behind so that others can move ahead and shine or to intentionally lower yourself in order to lift others up for their benefit. The reason behind such act or idea should not be to gain recognition or admiration and at the same time it should not be offered with disappointment and remorse. If it is contaminated by any of these factors, then though it may remain a good deed, it cannot be considered as a true expression of humility. I urge you to think of what it means to you and come up with your own understanding of humility.

Are we qualified to examine this quality?

I agree that you and I can learn a lot and become a better person as we gain more life experience. However, humility is much more than mere manners, ethics and moral. I believe improving and advancing ourselves is achievable only when we make a mindful commitment to examine our thoughts, experiences and actions, and then by trying to understand it in segments with impartiality. I am not suggesting that by thinking and talking about this, we would improve on the humble side of us. But by raising our awareness on this, we could then move forward incorporating these into our day-to-day thoughts and actions. On the other hand, if we dismiss this open dialogue with ourselves, then we are indirectly telling our subconscious mind that we have no desire to improve and we have given up on nurturing humility in us. I think even if we are defeated, we still remain a winner when it comes to having tried. Therefore, personally I am up for this challenge and I propose that you do take out time and conduct a thorough biopsy of all things humility. By saying so I do not mean that you need to do any practical exercise or academic research but the exercise and research within your internal self is the intrinsic notion. Be cautious that this may bring to surface our hidden ego (a thought for another day.) Note that humility lies on the fine line between our ego self and our true self.

I perceive humility to be on three different levels:

(1) The beginner level

It is a foundational stage towards a clearer mind. It is being honest, kind, sincere and modest. It is when one is fully aware of one’s behaviour, attitude and thoughts and constantly strives to cleanse oneself of false pride, arrogance, ego, and selfishness. At this state of consciousness one sees life as an opportunity to improve oneself and add value to others lives, and goes about just doing that. This form of humility is often reflected in people who have a grateful and helpful nature. Even if they run a business, it is with the intent to offer products or services of value to other people.

(2) The intermediate level

It is a broad and purer state of mind. It is obtaining genuine satisfaction and contentment in doing, being, and serving. It is when one is free from any kind of expectations and rewards, and is not seeking any form of acknowledgement and honour. At this stage, one views one's contribution as insignificant, compared to all one has received from others and from forces higher than one. In fact it is living with the awareness that every good thing one does or acquires is not really due to ones efforts or merits but a blessing from source that is greater than what one is aware of. It is reflected in people who possess a truly compassionate and peaceful nature. They help not because they think they are superior to others and feel pity on them, but because they tend to genuinely think of others well-being more. They look outward with the eyes of empathy and a focus on serving.

(3) The advanced level

It is an open and non-judgemental state of mind where one understands all as one and therefore that person is not an individual but a tiny drop, which after coalescing with countless drops forms a vast ocean. This ocean stretches from the world we know and senses we are receptive to, all the way to other dimensions and levels of existence and perhaps sensory experiences unrevealed to us. It is the ultimate state of being in unity with all, beyond seeking peace, when one is present in a state of void and behaves like a witness to all without indulging into the senses. It is reflected in people who see themselves indifferent to everyone and everything around. They are untouched by happiness or sorrow, success or failure, attachments and emotions (anger, offence, criticism etc.) Do such people exist? I think they do!

My insights:

One thing clear to me from these three levels is that humility is not about showing, feeling, sensing, emoting, and or perceiving. It is when the mind is in a neutral state and the person is open to their soul and to the universal mind, humility is born within. It reveals itself to others through an unswerving modest nature and kind gesture of a humble person. Although such a person usually carries themselves in a simple and subtle manner, their presence is felt as larger than life to the rest. Such people don’t necessarily commence a big mission or launch a world-wide movement; rather, they begin their journey with little steps. However, the effect of their pure intention and action do create positive ripples in the universe. Whether their work is reported, publicised, weighed, and acknowledged or not, these humans always end up making a huge positive impact to the lives of many. The contribution they make is incomparable. Not only do they bring about a positive shift in the universe, but in the process they unintentionally elevate themselves to another level – they unlock the doors to the house of great wisdom.

How much of humility can we develop?

We can’t force ourselves to achieve this state of mind and presence. Nonetheless, let’s be mindful that though our hearts may be temporarily polluted by internal delusion and our rational mind may be somewhat entangled in webs of external debris, yet our soul remains pure and our purpose to develop it remains firm. Once we accept that there is no room for pride and arrogance in our humble soul, a shift begins within. No matter what approach we take, it has to be executed by us individually, no one else can live our life for us and enhance the qualities that each of us possesses. By taking personal accountability of our thoughts and actions, we can bring about a positive change to our lives as well as of others and progress on our spiritual journey towards humility. I caution you to use your own judgement and rationale. Hence, after reading this I don’t expect you to allow others to throw their emotional, physical and mental trash on you thinking that you would be immune to its effects. That will only bring days of misery until you can’t hold it anymore and give up on this path you wanted to walk on. Therefore, instead let’s begin by continuing to be our normal self but proceed with greater awareness. As such, let’s work on our ability to maintain our composure at times when we otherwise would have thrown a tantrum out of frustration. I understand that when you try to find your tranquillity in moments of chaos and frustration, no one may know how challenging it is for you internally. Yet as you manage this, you would know deep inside that you are one step ahead on your path, change begins from within. No matter how insignificant it may seem, know what you have gained helps heal many souls not just yours. Remember that a lot can be achieved if you set your mind to it, if you nurture it in your heart, if you give yourself a chance, and only if you dare to let it be.

Closure

I hope my thoughts on humility gives you a platform to reflect on this cherished quality and share your valuable opinion and experiences with those who matter most to you, because walking along on an unfamiliar path can at times be daunting, the more company you have the merrier it will be. May together we cultivate the heights of humility that we always envisaged for this dear world we call home, where our ancestors have walked and which we need to preserve for our future generation.

May peace, light and love be with you.

Monita.

Thanking the higher power - a lifelong commitment of a daily discipline, a prerequisite for the internal journey to begin

To me the term ‘higher power’ is not restricted to the world’s definition of a god or THE god.  In terms of my free style writing and preliminary thoughts, I perceive this as the higher nature of all, irrespective of whether one is an agnostic, an atheist, a follower of any specific theism (monotheism, polytheism etc.) or even a lesser life form. In a broader sense, it is impossible to give a precise description of what I believe to be beyond human intellectual capacity. However, in the context of our soul advancement, I personally think it is the minute energy embedded in each form of creation and at the same time the colossal energy from which every creation emerges uninterruptedly. Well these are just my feeble attempts to express my limited understanding of what I sincerely consider to be ‘the formless mute truth in motion - the all.’

For you, it could mean something similar or completely different and likewise your experience and awareness of this could be on par with mine or much greater. Since our thoughts vibrate at different levels, I urge you to read this with an open mind and replace my definition of the higher power with yours. It is worth noting that when referring to the higher power here, I am using the words ‘it’, ‘he’ or ‘god’ for the ease of writing, you have the flexibility to address the higher power as per your discretion. I encourage you to allow your own thoughts to shine and connect with your interpretation of the higher power. It is necessary to note that the objective here is not to enforce my understanding or opinion of the higher power onto you as the reader but to make a precise point – that regardless of how each of us conceives it, thanking that higher power continually and with sincerity is the focal point of this piece of writing. Let me paraphrase, consistent and sincere thanking of the higher power you believe in or know of is a prerequisite for your internal journey to begin.

Allow me to share with you a short story of little me and my daddy to illustrate how my internal journey began. (Note you'll come across quite a few of my conversations with my father if I continue to write and provided you continue to read, he is my greatest inspiration.) I was about 4-5 years old. Dad and I had finished the ‘ring a ring o roses’ nursery rhyme. Ha! How I enjoyed seeing him falling down repeatedly, the naughty me still laughs! I vaguely recall the lengthy bedtime story daddy narrated to me that night and like every night my eyes were staring out the window, checking to see if the stars were out. Just before I headed off to my lala land of dreams, father decided to share with me something that went on to become a daily ritual and a part of my existence since then. He asked me to close my eyes and concentrate on the power that runs this universe and much more, somewhat like god. The rule was I must not ask this power/god for some favour but instead I must say my thank you to him for everything good I’ve been bestowed with. Coming from a Hindu family at that tender age this power to me meant Lord Rama, the protagonist of Indian epic Ramayana, whose fascinating tales took me to some utopian wonderland. Although my daily thanking started off exclusive to my childhood favourite Hindu avatar Rama, from an early age both my parents made it a point to introduce me to the concept of the higher power which is beyond any form or religion, and probably non-existent to some school of thoughts. Like many other parents, they often emphasized on the importance of respecting each religion and to consider all forms of god as one. At the same time, they also ensured that I be considered of other people’s point of view and do not preach my version of the higher self or god to people of other faiths or non-believers/atheists. Father asked me to try to see him in all instead, and let me tell you I ain't good at that one! A bit out of context there, but I think it was important to briefly highlight the mindset I'm coming from.

Fast forward it to the present. My version of the higher power has modified over the years but my thanking has continued. There aren’t many nights when I haven't thanked the higher power for all the good I’ve received. Those nights when I didn't say my thank you, it was rarely due to forgetfulness and I must admit that I was either too lazy or too overjoyed and didn’t want to partially focus on this just for the sake of it. On the contrary, at times I wasn't in a good spirit or happy to appreciate things in life. Those days I would close my eyes and frankly express my feelings, doubts, resentment etc. and go to sleep. Nevertheless, I always had this gut feeling that something bigger is around. I also admit a bit of cheating, in that along with thanking, I often can’t help but request this higher power to guide my family and me and to take care of us. However, my inner voice tells me that everything is in its place for that moment even if it seems imperfect or illogical to believe.

So many years have passed by this way. My little version has grown and my young daddy has gone old. I'm now a parent myself and daddy has become a grand dad. My recent visit to him, somehow I started with this awkward conversation and reminded him of that night. I told him that I still thank the higher power each night. I asked him if he also does the same. His simple words of reassurance were ‘yes I do and I never stopped to’. We went back to the conversations we had some 25-30 years ago. My heart was filled with immense joy because at that very moment we both touched each other at another level of consciousness. We were more than a father and a daughter; we were two souls in union with the same spirit. I am glad I brought up this topic with him.

I hope my short story reminded you of a special moment you had with your parent(s) and or child(ren). Moving out of that story, it hurts to realise that not every child grew up with the privilege of connecting with either of their parents as this bonding brings out the best in both the parent and child I believe. In case you have missed out on this connection with your parent/child/someone special, allow me to remind you that the greatest attribute of our being is our resilience. It is never too late to create special bonding with yourself and those around you. I shall put this line of thought to rest for now and may elaborate on it some other day. Coming back to the current subject matter, remember there is no adversity big enough to stop you from bonding with your higher self. As you accept this, I hope you do make a lifelong commitment to incorporate this daily discipline of thanking the higher power without any expectations in return. You'll be surprised how effortlessly it takes you on an inner journey to your real self. You'll pass through doors to higher planes that you never knew existed before, let aside finding them to be closed previously. Age isn't a barrier and know that nothing is restricting you. Despite whether you believe in god/higher power or not, everything continues to be vibrating and you got this opportunity to be present in this time and space;
you didn’t just happen to emerge from thin air. Thus, it is crucial to recite your thank you and express your gratitude with intent, even if it means thanking your own consciousness. By saying your sincere thank you, you are acknowledging the force higher than you, allowing it to reveal itself to you. We may identify ourselves as an atheist, a theist or anything in between, but we can’t deny that thanking is an impartial universal expression of graciousness for all. We all do say our thank you and encourage our children to do the same even for trivial things. For instance when we buy them a material thing (like an iPad) or do some special thing for them (like taking them on a picnic). The same rule applies here, we are more precious than any material thing (be it an iPad) and our life is more special than any other trip (be it a picnic). If we thank wholeheartedly and encourage others to do the same with gracious for things of little relevance, how can we not appreciate and thank the intelligence above all wisdom? What could we lose, and what may we gain, ever thought of that?

When I have that spark of overwhelming happiness or contentment from within without any particular reason, I believe this little thank you I recite each night to the universal mind is my secret to access that peace. As such, if there is one thing I must pass onto my children, future generation and share with others before my body goes to sleep and mind takes a rest, it would be to thank your higher self, the higher power, not just for the spur of the moment or when you visit your holy grounds but every day or every night. It takes as little as a minute and a moment of undivided attention is all you contribute. I am extremely grateful to my father for sharing this with me without worrying whether or not I'll understand him or doubting if I'll continue this lifelong commitment of a daily discipline or not. He showed me a short cut way to peace and to higher power.  That was his job. He did not deprive me of my freedom to create or acknowledge a version of the higher power that best resonates with me. That job was purely mine. Likewise, I am only sharing my thoughts and experiences with you of acknowledging and thanking that intelligence which is higher than all our knowledge put together. One can’t deny the higher forces that exist just because we have limited awareness of it. Nonetheless, remember ultimately it's your right to pick your version of it, to consciously and cautiously choose your path to peace.

I'll end this with one note: get up, wake up, open up to your higher self. I urge you to acknowledge that higher power and to never stop thanking him with sincerity. Even when your thoughts are covered with clouds of blue, and peace seems to be out of reach, know that sometimes we are not in the right spectrum to see things clearly. The Universal Law, the higher power puts everything everywhere into its right place, including within this temporary sphere we take so seriously called life. Don’t forget to do your bit, share this act of thanking with your loved ones for that would be your ultimate legacy and contribution to your generation and to this acquisitive age we exist in.

May peace, light and love be with you.

Monita.

Forgiveness - an initial step towards inner peace and outer harmony

Before you make up your perception of me, let me be plain honest - as an adult, I am not a forgiveness guru and in extreme cases, if given an option, I would rather ask my thoughts of forgiveness to come to mind another day when I'm feeling more benevolent. This is not something I am proud of and regardless of this side of my nature, I felt compelled to write my thoughts on this as one of the very first topics for my blog. Mainly, because deep within, I feel this is most important for my (spiritual) growth and as a matter of fact, for anyone else's. I believe that when we make a conscious decision to forgive and to let go of our grudges and resentment, we create space for more positive energy to flow through us. Therefore, though it is not my cup of tea, I consider forgiveness as my wake up coffee.

The mayhem before the forgiveness:
My understanding is that since the majority of our species do not have the privilege to interact with extraterrestrial beings but are stuck with fellow humans, topped with our extreme heights of humility to treat ourselves as a separate entity from our higher self, it is inevitable to miss out on a few impolite and disrespectful people in life. As a result, often someone's intentional non-justifiable, unfair, rude, and obnoxious behaviour or action creates feelings of deep resentment within us. The challenge is how we forgive such people, and mind you I am not talking about someone who jumped queue at your local fish market but more like when a person seriously demeans you or physically harms you. Needless to say immediate real life assistance is a must for the latter. 

So what really is forgiveness?

Forgiveness to me is the act of consciously volunteering to let go off any grudges and resentment against the offender. And I'll be frank, to me it does not mean being obliged to trusting or even socialising with the repeat offender(s). The keyword here is repeat, unless of course you plan to go on a long unpleasant merry go round adventure that has high prospects of causing further oppression.

Then why is it hard for the majority to forgive easily?
Most likely, because a lot of us including myself, have learnt along the way that an unjust or bullying behaviour is an unacceptable cowardice trait. Or possibly because in contrast, a lot of us have grown old either being a constant victim of this or witnessing this happening with an ease around us thus we consider it normal to victimize another. This just perpetuates animosity.

This leads me to the next question - what could ignite the flames of destruction in people to deliberately hurt another at an emotional, physical or mental level?
Jealously, selfishness, insecurity, inferiority complex, sadist nature, controlling nature, uncontrolled arrogance, hunger for money, overdose of power, inappropriate role models, damaged emotions while growing up, being lured by those in authority or even worse - a combination of these and much more! In summary, it is due to one giving preference to their darker side whilst failing to be sensible and sensitive towards others. I find it difficult to believe that people could be in denial of their negative behaviour, attitude and action because such perpetrators often do so very cunningly. 

Nevertheless for me, the path to forgiveness becomes smoother when I:

(1) analyse the whole situation - I talk about it to myself or to someone close and let the emotions sink in,
(2) accept the nature of forgiveness - that forgiveness is a process and it could be slow depending on the severity of the offence,
(3) appreciate myself for not being the offender who could be in need of empathy,
(4) realise that by asking myself to forgive the offender I am not agreeing with the offence but instead stopping it from interfering with my inner peace,
(5) remind myself how easily I used to forgive people during my childhood phase,
(6) focus on the need to guide my adult self out of negative internal chaos and external experiences, and
(7) thank the higher power/universe for giving me the opportunity to strengthen my character. 

And now the act of forgiving:
Having thought of forgiving is a good start. However, committing to the action itself can be quite challenging. No joke, at times it is more daring than confronting the offender. Not only does it requires patience and endurance but also sanity to deal with and handle questions from non-witnesses who haven't given a cent to your life otherwise. However, I must admit that despite these hiccups, forgiving brings with it a feeling of lightness, a genuine satisfaction, and much more room for internal brightness. There's also some substantial perks and rewards for the health and beauty freaks. We all heard it helps boost immunity to several diseases, calms down the nervous system, reduces signs of ageing, and adds life to the remaining years ahead. View forgiveness as life sustenance. 

In conclusion, I think forgiveness is a very noble deed; it's the act of being kind to ourselves as well as to those who haven't been kind to us. We can't force people to change for the better but we can better ourselves by acknowledging the fact that none of us are perfect - that to me unveils sublime courage. For the beginning of a positive journey, it is crucial that we bring to an end all travels towards past bitterness. As such, no matter how impossible it seems or how untrue it may sound, fortunately I somehow do manage to bring myself to a state of peace and harmony where I focus on the spirit within the offender and see its unity with mine. (Not for long yeah!) This generates an electrifying sense of gratification from within and though briefly, it reveals to me the subtle power of the spirit within. Forgiveness thus is a treasured gift I've given to myself and a thoughtful gift (sometimes an unclaimed one) I've given to the offender. Generally, it results in healing of two souls therefore, in my opinion it is mandatory (not an option) and an initial step towards inner peace and outer harmony.

However in saying so, these are my unfabricated viewpoints, coping mechanisms and mindful steps toward forgiveness. Are you aware of yours? Unless you are an easily forgiving being, it may be worthwhile doing your own soul search and consider gifting yourself and the wrongdoer with some genuine forgiveness. Or maybe you know where you currently stand and are happy with your progress but never shared your perspectives on forgiveness with your loved ones, your family especially your children. I would urge you to involve them in some stimulating discussions. Chances are one day they will be grateful you did and who knows your little effort may inspire them to be considerate of themselves as well as all around them and that is a big accomplishment, don’t you agree?

May peace, light and love be with you.

Monita.